Motivation to Learn when in Despair. LO28639

From: AM de Lange (amdelange@postino.up.ac.za)
Date: 05/28/02


Replying to LO28588 --

Dear Organlearners,

Michael Bremer < CGCMIke@aol.com > writes

>I cannot begin to imagine what advice would benefit the
>family situation you describe. The picture you paint of
>South Africa is bleek and I find it difficult to relate to it
>from my experience (perspective) living in Chicago and
>my experiences in traveling around the world.

Greetings dear Michael,

I would say that the majority of families in Pretoria who have a
sustainable income, are so caught up in the organisations in which all
the family members work, serve and share that they they are not
aware of the others who do not have a sustainable income.

Let me add this is not judgement. It is an observation. It is an
observation that in these organisations there are no learning about
those who are not part of organisations any more.

What goes on in countries north of our own, is far more bleeker. Thus
our country is flooded by millions of desperate people seeking help
here. Almost every one getting here find him/herself excluded from
any kind of organisation you can think of. They become organisation-
less people.

>I do have a question. Most parents want their children
>to have a better life. Would it be better for this family to
>allow a child to go to foster care? Certainly not if the
>results of that foster care are unknown or if abuse would
>be likely. However, if the child stands a chance of more
>personal growth and safety, is it better to give the child up?
>I certainly do not know the answer and am not in a
>position to judge anyone else. It is simply one possible path.

Dear Michael, my dear wife and I acted as foster parents for two
other children, trying to do our share. And we are glad we did it
because these two children have become responsible citizins. We
would still like to do it, but we know that the older a parent
become, even though the wiser, the less knocks that parent can take.

We acted as foster parents because these two children were in a
desperate situation. Nobody else wanted to act as foster parents
to them. However, that ended 15 years and 5 years ago. Now is
different. Thousands of kids, especially non-white kids, become
orphans each month as a result HIV-AIDS taking the parents away.
There are just not enough families any more (the smallest social
organisation) to care for these orphans. And with a 45% rate of
unemployment, there is just not enough money to care for them
by larger organisations.

>I just finished working with a group of people in
>New York state who work for a large organization
>that is downsizing. Many of the people act like victims
>of change and do little to gain some degree of control
>of their destiny. They feel and act powerless. Part of
>my work points out that many pathways exist. There is
>not one pathway or just one outcome.

I agree with this in a normal society. But in a society caught up in
a "die-off", the biggest single problem is for a person to become
going on whatever way to be chosen.

>We all make choices, sometimes those choices are
>difficult. I make a choice to let outside forces cast me
>where they may, I also make a choice to try to do
>something. When people let fear control them, to some
>degree thy freeze their mind and become quite rigid.
>New possiblities may stare them in the face, but you
>cannot see them from a rigid perspective.

This I also agree to in a normal society. But in a society caught up in
a "die-off", these people have simply not access any more in society's
organisations as far as money goes. They are outsiders. To buy into
an organisation (even like a supermarket or a bus), they need money
which they do not have. The family which I speak for, lives in a
caravan park. It is an organisation. Once they cannot pay their rent,
they will get kicked out. So say will have to find a piece of gound
further away from the city to squat upon, making an adope of
whatever they can lay their hands on.

>The picture you paint is bleek. I certainly do not know
>how I would act if I were the one in that position. But,
>it seems like once people can accept (in their minds and
>in their hearts) the worst thing that could happen they are
>in a position to open their minds. Fear no longer controls
>them.

Michael, thank you for your compassionate thinking. Perhaps, as
a last option, we will have to take the little girl in when the mother
is unable to cope with it all.

In a society caught up in a "die-off", it is somewhat different. Those
who have a risky job (one that could end tomorrow) are the ones
who live in constant fear. It is they who can change within a wink
into a frenzy mob when, for example, a train comes late or an
organisation becomes downsized.

The worst to me is that as the "die-off" increases, the leaders of
many organisations become more unscrupulous themselves. This
means that the worser the "die-off", the less the leaders support
their followers.

Those who are cut off from organised society is rather like drift
wood, too tired to swim in the torrent anymore. They have far
less fear because they experience daily what the others fear to
experience. They simply wish for the end of the world to come.

Please, I do try to sound as if I know what to do. I do not know.
What I try to do, is to describe to you fellow learners as clearly as
possible how I observe the situation. This is far from knowledge.

>My thoughts (positive) and prayers,

Thank you.

With care and best wishes

-- 

At de Lange <amdelange@gold.up.ac.za> Snailmail: A M de Lange Gold Fields Computer Centre Faculty of Science - University of Pretoria Pretoria 0001 - Rep of South Africa

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