Hello everyone,
Today I received an email from an old friend asking about paternalism. I
wrote the following response off the top of my head, but as the day has
moved on, I thought I'd offer this and ask what your thoughts are on the
subject.
It's made me think, and I'm eager to hear more thoughts. My friend's
inquiry reminded of the power question has to awaken.
~~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Primarily, it is a situation in which one person allows another to grow
only to the extent that he/she does not reach or exceed the first person's
level of knowledge, power, privilege, status. It is when a person or
organization "takes care" of someone -- provides for them to the extent
that they contribute but don't grow too far into an independent state.
Interdependence -- the state beyond independence -- is a threat to
paternalism because people are mixing and being generative which threatens
the status quo of the system. It threatens on a number of levels -- those
engaged in paternalistic practices are now challenged to grow again and
they may have decided that they are through learning. It threatens
because those in "power" do not want to see the distribution of power,
privilege and wealth shift. The system is laden with contradictions. It
openly promotes communication but only communication that gives status --
hardly ever does it provide communication that promotes generative
thought. It openly promotes strength in diversity but actually delegates
all but those not in power to a homogeneous minority. It is a closed
system -- not an open system.
You could go on and on -- but in the end, paternalism is, in part,
grounded in the fear of being left behind. Kahlil Gibran's piece from the
prophet says a lot about the kind of attitude that promotes growth in
others:
Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters
of Life's longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you
yet they belong not to you.
You may give them your love but not your thoughts,
for they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow,
which you cannot visit,
not even in your dreams.
You may strive to be like them,
but seek not to make them like you.
For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.
You are the bows from which your children
as living arrows are sent forth.
The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite,
and He bends you with His might
that His arrows may go swift and far.
Let your bending be in the archer's hand for gladness;
For even as He loves the arrow that flies,
so He loves also the bow that is stable.
Thanks,
John
--John Dicus | CornerStone Consulting Associates -- Bringing Systems To Life -- 2761 Stiegler Road, Valley City, OH 44280 800-773-8017 | 330-725-2728 (2729 fax) http://www.ourfuture.com | mailto:jdicus@ourfuture.com
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